Special back powernet panel

FADE IN:

INT. DOWNTOWN SHOPPING MALL DAY

WR rushes through the mall corridor in an attempt to avoid the men with ponytails, asking to see her jagged cuticles and pushing their Dead Sea lotion skincare line.

Before WR dashes to the second floor escalator, she spots the Victoria’s Secret storefront display of headless mannequins in fishnets and corsets. Above the entryway is the SEMI-ANNUAL SALE sign.

WR
(aside)
Ohh…the semi-annual panty sale.

Enter SALESWOMAN who smells of stripper perfume -- combination of cupcakes, cotton candy and freesia. She also wears a black suit as if she is going to a “meeting” with executive clientele and wears stiletto heels. For eight hours this woman is going to wear stiletto heels. She presents to me a bra.

SALESWOMAN
This is very sexy.

WR
Huh? What…yes, I guess it is very sexy.

SALESWOMAN
No, it’s Very Sexy™, our new bra.

WR
Oh, okay…whatever. It’s very sexy. Are you hitting on me? Is this appropriate?

SALESWOMAN
(flips hair)
No, it’s our new line.

WR
(studdering)
I’m just browsing. But, yes, it’s very sexy. You’re very sexy. It’s all very sexy. Can I just sort through these bins of incredibly uncomfortable panties now?

FADE OUT

It’s at this point that purchasing a 4-pack of cotton panties seems more prudent than searching through boxes of bedazzled dental floss. Old-fashioned nudity is sexier than deceiving support panels that hoist and smooth. There are enough pulley systems and fly panels in their signature line to make the whole naughty bit coverage more theatrical than it should be. Then again, headless mannequins are pretty damned sexy.